How you lose yourself

I didn't think I would lose myself. I used to like thinking of myself as someone who guarded my identity with such vigour that my life's compass would always show me the right way.

Yet, like a complacent sailor at sea, I hit an unknown storm, and lost my way.

It didn't happen all in one go, but slowly.

Like a tsunami, everything seemed better at first - lower tides, calm sea. Then, it all came crashing down.

And I was standing right there, letting every wave fall on me like it was the most natural thing to do.

There's a lot of little details - how it happened, why it happened, who caused it... but that's not important now. The fact is I should not have lost my way. I should have been stubborn, stood my ground and continued my journey, even when ten people around me say, "Lu Wee, you're going the wrong way!"

Because, there's nothing worse than a smooth journey in the direction you don't even want to go.

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